Utter confusion.

My mind is at a loss. I cared about someone who obviously doesn't feel the same for me. I'm learning to let go and move on slowly a part of me has died, but I'm hoping that someone can help revive those deadened pieces. My life has been so empty and useless at times. I would have given the world for it to work out. I know he doesn't care but deep done I do still love him and still care. I just wanted to hear him admit to the things he did and be honest with me. Instead the blame was layed upon me and my illness and my fight to sort out my emotions. Now add to that I have someone else who basically never fought for us trying to get me to see we may have a chance. Plus this whole new thing. I'm utterly confused and sad. Yet someone else I would have given the world to whom refused to acknowledge my existence with his loved ones. I want to be cherished showed off talk to an loved. I'm not asking much. 

Than there is Leah she never stops making me smile. Thank goodness she has been in my life. She gives me pure unconditional love. <3